Mindset around horses...

MINDSET AND HORSES: HOW YOUR INNER WORLD SHAPES YOUR PARTNERSHIP

Mindset is one of the most powerful tools we have as horse people. I often get asked: How do you stay focused?
 How do you stay inspired and dedicated?
 The truth is, mindset is at the core of everything I do - both with my own horses and with my students.

WHY GOALS MATTER

A strong mindset begins with having a plan. That means setting realistic short-term, medium-term, and long-term goals. Goals give us purpose and direction. Without them, it’s easy to drift and lose motivation and that impacts not only us, but also our horses.

HORSES FEEL EVERYTHING

Horses are incredibly sensitive. They pick up on subtle changes in our posture, breathing, energy, and emotions. Just as I can often sense the mood of a student by their body language, horses read us the same way. They know when we’re present, distracted, frustrated, or at peace.

This is why mindset is not just about staying positive for ourselves, it’s also about the messages we send our horses every moment we’re around them.

MOST PEOPLE THINK ABOUT THEMSELVES

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is that, most of the time, people are focused on themselves. Even when they’re watching you do something impressive, they’re usually thinking about how it relates to them: “Why can’t I do that? Could I ever learn that?”

Understanding this helps me as a teacher, I don’t take reactions personally. Instead, I focus on how to lift my students’ mindset by paying attention to what they might be feeling and guiding them back to a more positive state.

MANAGING YOUR OWN ENERGY

Of course, I’m only human too. I have days where personal challenges weigh on me. The key is learning not to carry that into the stable. Horses deserve the best version of us.

That doesn’t mean suppressing feelings, but it does mean recognizing:

• When we’re in “fight or flight” mode.
• When stress hormones are affecting us.
• When it’s better to take a step back.

If our inner world is chaotic, how can we expect our horses to feel calm and safe?

HORSES AS MIRRORS

Over the years, I’ve seen my horses reflect my mindset back to me. When my confidence wavered, they became unsettled. When I found stability, they softened. My horse Mia never allowed me to doubt myself without showing me instantly that something was off.

And when I went through a tough period in my own life - during early menopause, when my hormones and emotions were all over the place, my Lenny mirrored that right back to me. His spookiness wasn’t “misbehavior”; it was a reflection of my state of mind.

This is both confronting and empowering.
 Confronting, because it means we can’t hide.
 Empowering, because it means by working on ourselves, we change everything.

DIFFERENT HORSES, DIFFERENT RESPONSES

Not every horse reflects mindset in the same way. My little Benny, for example, is such an independent extrovert that he doesn’t immediately pick up on every mood shift. But when I spend time with him with my bonding program Zero On Expectations, he connects deeply. It’s a reminder that every horse is an individual and yet all of them benefit when we bring stability into our presence.

BEING A STABLE PRESENCE

The biggest gift we can give our horses is consistency. For me, that means showing up every day with the same tone, posture, and energy. Whether I’m grooming, feeding, or training, I aim to be steady and reliable. Horses thrive when they know who we are and when we remain that same person in different circumstances.

But here’s the challenge: are you the same around your horse when you’re alone as when others are watching?
 Many riders unknowingly shift their energy when friends, partners, or crowds are present. Horses notice.

MY PERSONAL CHALLENGE

For me, that shift has often shown up in live events. At home, I feel relaxed and connected. In front of a crowd, I’ve sometimes struggled with nerves, fear of judgment, and self-doubt. My horses felt it too.

That’s why mindset is an ongoing journey. Just as I encourage my students to push themselves, I also push myself to grow and to be the same calm, stable person whether at home or in front of thousands.

A QUESTION FOR YOU

So, here’s something for you to reflect on:

• Who are you around your horse?
• Are you consistent, calm, and reliable?
• Or do you change depending on circumstances, moods, or who is watching?

Becoming aware of these shifts is the first step to improvement.

THE BONUS

When you work on your mindset, not just once, but as a daily practice - everything improves.
 Your horse feels safer and more connected.
 Your relationship deepens.
 And you, too, become happier and healthier.

Mindset isn’t something to fear. It’s a gift. And our horses are our greatest teachers in learning how to use it well.

Need support on your journey or simple day-to-day tasks?

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